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Prompt: Comic book cover, of a super hero in a dirty costume, lounging in front of the tv, drinking a beer, piles of trash litter the floor, the title "The Procrastinator" is written in bold font on top, 2d illustration --ar 3:4 --v 6.1
"That's me, Marcus Fleet. A.K.A. The Procrastinator, A.A.K.A. Mr. Took-You-Long-Enough. I never amounted to much. Graduated high school with mediocre grades, got a boring office job that barely pays the rent, and basically scraped by in life.
It probably would've stayed that way if fate hadn’t decided to sucker-punch me right in the metaphorical groin. Through a series of unlikely events—mostly thanks to my general lack of commitment—I ended up with the power of foresight. Yeah, I can predict when a crime’s about to go down before it happens.
The thing is, I just can’t muster the energy to actually do anything about it. Do you know how many heroes there are in this city? Most of the crimes I foresee will get handled anyway by Mr. Awesome Beam, The Bucktoothed Wombat, The Harmonica Twins, or one of those other glory hogs.
So, I just relax until I’m really needed. You’d be amazed how much binge-watching and doom scrolling you can get done when you wait until the absolute last moment. Then, I show up, push the button, punch the bad guy, cut the wire—whatever quick fix is needed—and save the day. Sure, a few things have gone sideways when I got distracted, but hey, nobody’s perfect! Sometimes you just get caught up reading about magnetic dentures, fall down a Wikipedia rabbit hole, and next thing you know… well, oops.
...Anyway, that's my life. And I’ll keep telling you more after I shove The Viscous Violin into a vat of vittles in, like… 10 minutes?! Fu-"
I would watch / read this.
did you watch Hancock?
Tried to watch it several times. Never made it to the end. It seems to be 2 movies merged badly together in one movie.
As far as i remember Hanckock was not really a procrastinator, but simply did not care at all initially.
i thought, as funny as it is as an idea or a joke, this would make a worse than Hancock movie. We would watch a guy do nothing for at least 90 minutes
In my head the stories would be about a 70/30 division of mostly other heroes trying to save the day and the Procastinator dealing with some mundane problem or obsession, knowing that he'll probably need to help but he still has plenty of time.
The story would escalate with the heroes fighting the big bad guy of the day. While the Procastinator is aware that he really should be stepping in soon, but postponing it to deal with whatever is in front of him at that moment. Figuring he still has time, as long as he really rushes later on.
The climax will end with the heroes almost defeated and the Procastinator swearing and running to do the thing he needs to do. He'll end up getting there just in time (usually), to do some really simple thing that will -in an almost Rube Goldbergesque manner- ruin the bad guy's plans, and save the day.
The heroes will be pissed off, because of course the Procastinator could have solved this hours ago if he just managed to get off his ass a bit sooner. Maybe Mr. Awesome Beam's cape will be shredded, or the Bucktooth Wombat's WomTruck will be completely smashed because of his late appearance. And they'll act like a bunch of thankless assholes, as usual.
The Procrastinator will take their behavior as an excuse so he won't have to learn anything about time management and the story will repeat next week/issue.
depending on who's writing the dialogues (or rather monologues 🙂), this might be fun to watch
@sethRogen @ryanReynolds 😋
I could see the procrastinator in the one punch man universe.
No we, would watch him watching other heroes doing the job. Maybe with some snarky commentary from the procrastinator.