Autism

Ah for sure we're not in the same country, cause my ass is as American as a sloppy grilled cheese sandwich and a crusty can of tomato soup =P! No worries by the by, I think (cause I've done it a couple of times) - you just kinda like...click the person's name and there's an option somewhere past that. But I am on desktop and I couldn't even begin to tell you on mobile.

I am so super glad you ran into that therapist. Look, I will shout it from the rooftops that I literally love the crap-crackers outta my therapist. They are a wonderful human being, and they just are so real and so present. Like just so freakin' cool! It's always a blessing when you find those people who are just there. Themselves. Real af. Dope! And they vibe with you. I have a teacher I've stayed in touch with hundreds of years later, because I think they really made a difference in my life and they are just such a wonderful organic human being. And when I think of stand-up people, they're at the top of my list. BLAM!

It was kinda shady how he did you, but it sounds like he gave you everything you needed. I'm taking some time off right now. I've got a loving supportive partner, and originally I was lined up for a couple of surgeries. But my amaze-a-balls doctor told me about a radical new treatment I could give a go, so instead I am just getting a chance to rest. Which is crazy, because I don't know if I've ever rested in all my days @_@! And it is still weird, but while I am in pain (and yeah, unfortunately I am still in pain) it's not as much as it was. And I have way more mobility than before and can do way more than I could for a while there. But I am pretty blessed that my partner and I are pretty low-needs and we can make it on one income as long as we're smart about it.

I was making food yesterday after writing to you, and I did get hit with a case of the sads. Because I thought about it, and when I said I really didn't think my life would play out like this I really did mean it. And I have been practicing radical acceptance, because I think such things are necessary in situations like this. But I am also really sad because I know I've got a lot to give to the world and have lived quite the adventure for someone like myself. But I also figure that organically things tend to slow down the older you get. And to live in the past is to live like a fool. Ultimately dream aspirations are to move back to a super-dense city with my partner, work for some kind of non-profit (but not one full of bullshitters...which can be hard to find), and to be well enough to hold my own. But I am not sure these things will be obtainable the way I see them, and I have also sort of had to come to terms with that as well. Now, I've just gotta fudge my way through, cause it's all I've got.

Idk if I we'll "meet" again (cause it's a small community but people come and go as they please) but I really hope your life only gets better from here on out. That no matter where you go, you keep getting all the support and assistance you need and keep being the sassy (and probably funny) advocate you are. Cause the more of us that are open about our real life issues and our day-to-day struggles the more people will realize we're just humans - out here, trying to live - just going through it is all.

Big hugs (sis? Getting strong sis vibes. I wanna sis you =P!) and keep being you =)