this post was submitted on 01 Jul 2024
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Anxiety

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Hi. I'm new here. I am a workaholic. When I started to notice my mental decline I was working in very important role at one of the largest companies in the world. All I could see was the end prize, financial freedom. A few years in I knew I was going through health issues because sleeping was rough, I always felt on edge. All I wanted to do was make sure my wife would be set up if I died.

One day I could not take it anymore. I went to a different company. Took less than a week and I had the big one. A complete breakdown. I didn't know what it was until a friend told me it may be panic attacks.

I got let go in about a year. I've been bouncing around jobs since. I get back up, I apply myself, I'm determined; or more like super productive due to stress.

Then I heard about a friend's spouse who died of cancer. They were younger than myself. It just breaks me with a lot of what-if questions. If this happened to me, I didn't enjoy life. I just worked. I got little progress to show for it except money in what feels like a doomed economy. I worked to make sure my wife can live an enjoyable life when I am gone. I don't have a clue how to have fun.

I am now stuck with a lot of what-if questions that don't have answers. I start my new job in about a week. It's a good company, pays well, allegedly they care a lot about their employees. I just wish life would slow down enough to process things; deal with the anxiety issues. Now that I can breathe a bit again and about to regain my footing I feel more stressed.

Tl;dr I don't know how not to have my life revolve around work.

Edit: feel free to offer advice. I'm kind of just in my own anxiety right now.

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[–] Hotmailer -3 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Here's a different take: you are sitting a top a ball of magma, cruising though thr galaxy at 4.5 billion miles a year, rotating at 24901 miles a day.

Yeah,you can believe God doesn't exist, or you can start learning.

Surah Al-A'raf (7:146): "I will turn away from My signs those who are arrogant upon the earth without right; and if they should see every sign, they will not believe in it. And if they see the way of consciousness, they will not adopt it as a way; but if they see the way of error, they will adopt it as a way. That is because they have denied Our signs and they were heedless of them."

[–] [email protected] 2 points 5 days ago (1 children)

Surah? What is the quote from? I also never said I didn't believe there was a god/gods. I'm an analyst. I look at information all day and determine that I am very finite and lack a purpose. And that stings.

[–] Hotmailer 1 points 4 days ago* (last edited 4 days ago)

Its from the Quran. Surah means chapter. Everything has a purpose: your phone, a house etc. And a creator or maker. Humans have a purpose too. According to Islam, God created a vast and endless paradise, way before he created earth. The purpose of life is to give of your wealth and time in the hopes of earning enough points and the mercy of God and be rewarded in the next life. Yes, we take gamified things for granted today as it's everywhere, but this was revealed 1400 years ago. That's why we rush to help the needy etc. Also, if you never become Muslim and you do these things, you will be rewarded in this life for them. So if you want more money, give in charity.

Here's a series on your true home: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLQ02IYL5pmhGLpO-oUMpZbuI_5dT9m4fi