this post was submitted on 22 Jun 2024
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The Monkey's Paw

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Want to make a wish? Just ask the Monkey’s Paw! No strings attached.*

Just create a post that starts with “I wish ___”. Other users will then grant you the wish, and probably not how you intended.

^(*)^ ^Strings^ ^definitely^ ^attached.^ ^Satisfaction^ ^not^ ^guaranteed.^ ^Wish^ ^will^ ^likely^ ^backfire.^

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[–] rtxn 5 points 4 months ago* (last edited 4 months ago)

In addition, the Earth's sudden stop means that OP's relative velocity is around 220 km/s because of the solar system's orbit around the galactic center. If OP is on the prograde side, they are launched through the air and evaporate before they have a chance to die in the cold of space. If OP is on the retrograde side, they immediately splatter against the planet with a kinetic energy of about 1.5 terajoules (assuming a body mass of 60 kg).