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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/No-Seat6918 on 2023-06-27 15:00:22+00:00.
Throwaway to avoid family stuff.
I (M32) have been with my girlfriend (F29) for 8 years. From the very beginning we have been childfree. My girlfriend isn't a big fan of kids, and while I love being the fun uncle, I love being able to give them back.
Some background - My girlfriend is incredibly introverted and suffers from anxiety. Because of this, she is definitely a homebody and prefers hanging out at home with our two dogs. She likes things quiet and calm and definitely thinks of the house as her safe space. I completely respect that.
I watch my 2 nephews and my niece, 7, 5, and 3, once in a while for my sister and brother in law. I always go over to their house to watch the kids. Partially because all their stuff and toys are there and it's just easier, and because I know my girlfriend wouldn't enjoy having them over at the house. Plus she didn't agree to watch them so that wouldn't be fair.
We've had some really lovely weather lately and my sister and BIL have been asking me to take the kids over to my place to watch them instead. They live in a townhome and don't have much of a yard while we are pretty lucky and have a pretty large backyard. I've offered to take the kids to the park instead if they want some outside time.
Neither my sister or BIL like this much. They say that they would rather have the kids in a safer fenced in yard to run around and play then at a public park.
It all came to a head this past weekend. My BIL called and asked if I was available to watch the kids. I told him sure that wouldn't be a problem. He, politely at first, asked if he could drop the kids off with me for a change. I told him no I would come to them. He got a little frustrated and said the kids really needed some fresh air and to get their energy out. I said Okay we can go to the park. He exploded at me and told me I was an asshole for never letting the kids come over. He said nevermind he didn't want me to watch them because I was too selfish.