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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Excellent_Plate_9002 on 2023-06-26 13:44:49+00:00.
My mom was not active in my life when I was young. She left it all to my dad. He was such a good dad too and he did his best to make up for mom never being around. They were married btw. She was married to her job mostly. Or always doing her own thing. Dad would try to bring us together but she always had excuses. A year before he died I noticed he started to grow more frustrated with her. She'd let us both down many times and they started arguing. The day he died (he got into a crash) he stormed out of the house after mom accused him of trying to pawn me off on her and how she wasn't some cheap babysitter.
After he died she was in a weird place for a few months. I hardly saw her and spent most time at my uncle (dad's best friends) house. She met someone new and dedicated a lot of time to him. I was 11 when dad died. Had turned 12 when she met her husband. It was obvious how different she was with her second husband. It was also obvious when she had kids with him that she was a more involved mom. She actually went with them to see Santa, took them places, made memories. All stuff she never did with us or even me. I resent it. I'll be honest. Her husband noticed it before I moved out of their house and called me out on not being happy for my "siblings" and him. I told him he got everything my dad had begged for. That I would not be happy she let my dad die unhappy, that she made me unhappy my whole childhood. He called me childish. I told him I didn't give a fuck about his opinion or his happiness.
I moved out before I graduated and before I even turned 18 (live with my uncle now). It was just better. Ever since mom has been like why don't you visit, why do you never call, why do you never answer texts (she texted me twice before that point in 3 months). She asked to meet me last week so I did since she was paying. She told me she was doing better by her family now and did not like that I carried such a clear grudge. She said she's doing everything with them to make sure they don't miss her like I did and I should be happy for her and them. That she'd like to think my dad would be happy for her. I told her there is no way he would have been happy she ignored the kid he had with her and did everything he wanted with me for other kids. I told her at the end of his life dad probably didn't even love her anymore, like she clearly never loved us. I told her I will never be happy that she's doing better with her do over family. That she could take her pawning off and cheap babysitter ass and stay the hell away from me. She called me spiteful and said I should love my "siblings" enough to be glad for them at least.
She also sent me a text over the weekend saying I'm just like she was and congratulations for being what I hate. AITA?
Also "siblings" is because I do not consider them that. They are her kids but she's not really my mom so they're not really my siblings.