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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/SpinachGreen334 on 2023-06-26 08:40:50+00:00.
I 32F work for a designer clothing brand and as staff we all get to take some of the sample size items for free. I am a size XXS, so most the clothing fits me, and usually I take it home. I can't afford these clothes otherwise as they are expensive and 90% of what I wear is the brand.
My niece (on my husband's side) May 16f loves the brand and recognised one of the dresses I wore when we first met, when she comes to visit me, she loves going through my wardrobe and seeing the clothing.
For her 16th, the only thing she asked for was a dress from my company. My company is not size inclusive anyway and the sample size items I pick from are usually XXS/XS, I have seen a few S items, but as the items are given to my whole company they are the ones that go first.
May gave me her measurements, a size which in my history of 8 years, I have seen twice in the sample sizes, but I go quite late as my size is usually left. I reminded May that the way we get clothing and its sizing tends to run small, and sometimes other departments see items first and also asked if she wanted anything else for her birthday but she only wanted a dress. I still asked my coworkers to keep an eye out for anything in May's size and went earlier ro get clothing, but I didn't see anything in her size.
I got May a designer dress from a brand more affordable we also like in her size. She thanked me for her gift, but I could tell she was disappointed. Afterwards, she found the label inside which says plus size. My SIL has yelled at me for fat shaming a young girl and said I should be ashamed of myself, but in my eyes that is just a size and May's size is healthy for her height.
I went over to see May and sat her down and explained our clothing sizes and the limitations of the samples, but it may have come across insensitive. She didn't say anything to me and left after. I know now I should have said something about the sizing earlier, but I didn't know how to bring it up, and I had about 7 months to find May's size and thought I would find something., as we tend to get more samples this time of year.