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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Gold_Astronomer6490 on 2023-06-26 08:26:49+00:00.
I(34F) have been married to my husband(40M) for 5 years now.
Now some background on me: I was the oldest of 10 kids, both parents worked, so I ended up pretty much raising most of my youngest siblings. It was so bad, that I ended up running away from home after graduating highschool, and am still NC with my parents to this day.
When I met my husband 6 years ago, I told him that I was childfree, and don't plan to date someone with kids. He lied to me and said that he didn't have kids. Fast foreward 2 years, after we got married, and I find out that he actually has 3 kids (14F and twin 12M). We almost got divorced, but after couples' counseling, we stayed together, on the condition that me and his kids are never in the same house.
So far, whenever they visited (which was rare, and for a weekend at most), I would just go stay with a friend, or book a hotel. But this time, they will be visiting for 3 weeks.
So I just booked a vacation for myself to a beach town, and am planning to enjoy my time without having to take care of kids.
My husband says that it's an AH move, his kids think that I hate them, because I never agree to meet them, and that they were excited to meet me, and to get to know their stepmother. I told him that I did not sign up to be a step parent, he knew it yet chose to force it on me, so he should deal with his kids and their expectations.
We are not on speaking terms right now, and he insists I am an AH to innocent kids, so AITA?