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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/Trick-Ad7919 on 2023-06-23 19:16:08+00:00.
My partner (m35) of one year and I (f34) are looking for a flat to rent so we can move in together or we can stay in the one I’m currently renting (he can move in). Either one is fine with me.
I’ve moved out when I was 18 and worth the exception of first year of uni (uni halls) I haven’t lived with flat mates unless you count my ex boyfriend. My current partner, Adam, has lived with his family till he was 25, then with his girlfriend, then flatnates, then girlfriend and back to flatnates.
We’re currently looking for flats and we’re lucky enough that rent is not a problem and we can pick and choose.
Now, Adam dropped a bombshell. He wants to live with a flatmate (his friend and his girlfriend). I said absolutely no without even thinking about it. I’m way too used to independence to share a flat with another couple. That might have been fine in my 20s but not at this point in my life.
Adam got really upset and asked me to at least think about it. I told him that I’m sorry but I don’t have to and the answer is no, I am not willing to sacrifice my lifestyle and comfort to share a house with other people.
He said his friends can’t afford to rent on their own and we would be doing them a favour. I stood my ground and said, I’m sorry but this is non-negotiable z
He called me a spoiled brat and a selfish asshole. He knows I grew up poor so the spoiled brat comment was really mean.
He’s refused to go to a house viewings we’ve had scheduled and to the most recent one he brought his friend.
I got really annoyed and confronted him once we were alone. He still thinks I’m Ty e asshole for not even trying to share a house and I told him I’m way too old to try it since I know I won’t like it. He’s still mad. I understand that sharing is a necessity for some while others enjoy it. I like my peace and quiet and worked hard to be able to afford that. But I worry he Might be right AITA for not wanting to share my house?