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The original was posted on /r/AmItheAsshole by /u/ConstructionNext2291 on 2023-06-23 00:19:57+00:00.
I've been with my wife for 7 years. During the first 6 months we split up and I ended up getting with my buddies roommate "Kenzie" a few times. I screwed up, is basically what it boils down to. I never had interest in Kenzie romantically and she was fully aware of that but after 3 times, she started talking about loving me. So I called things off and told my now wife everything (we were still living together-sleeping in the same bed). It took awhile but she forgave me. I would NEVER do that again. I still to this day regret what I did. My wife still has issues surrounding Kenzie because she caused problems after I ended it. Calling me from blocked numbers, texting my now wife, asking to stay at my place (with my now wife) and saying she needed me. She's been blocked for years.
Well, I stopped going to my buddies house after this all happened. Kenzie ended up moving out but I still didn't go there. He came to my place instead. However, he threw a party the other night and invited me and my wife. My wife wasn't feeling well and decided not to go but told me to go have fun and she would pick me up later (I was going to be drinking). Maybe about an hour in, I'm pretty drunk and out of no where Kenzie is hugging me and trying to engage in conversation. Saying how much she missed me, etc. It took me a minute but I eventually said "I'm sorry but I really have no desire to talk to you and my wife hates you so please leave me alone" and she did. She walked off, pissed. So I truly didn't see it as a big deal. Crisis diverted, is what I thought.
Now, I didn't tell my wife she was here but I did ask her if she was feeling well enough to join me a few times. I just didn't want to tell her over text or call. I wanted her with me because I really didn't want to leave. After her saying no a few times, I just asked her to come get me (a couple hours later). When she showed up, she immediately saw Kenzie. I guess she was standing near me somewhere and I didn't notice her. She was silent the whole night. The next day she said "I can't believe you stayed there and didn't tell me she was there. You should have fucking come home when she showed up." AITA?