Asklemmy

I've been drinking brewed cacao (Cacao beans roasted, ground, and brewed like coffee) almost every day lately. So that.

H1O mixed with some Hydrogen. Check mate.

Arnold palmers. Nothing beats em

Tequila, some ice

D₂O, and then make a living selling my piss to chemical manufacturers

e:

How Drinking Heavy Water Could Kill You

Algae and bacteria can live with 100% heavy water and no regular water. Plant and animal cells are more complex, so too much heavy water results in sickness or death. One key issue is that heavy water disrupts mitosis, the type of cell division used to repair injuries and grow new cells. The mitotic spindles of cells containing too much heavy water simply aren’t able to equally divide a cell to form two identical new ones.

But, you have to continuously drink and eat only heavy water for several days to see an effect. Replacing 20% of regular water in cells with heavy water is survivable for humans and other mammals (although not recommended). Swapping 25% of water with heavy water causes (sometimes irreversible) sterilization. Replacing 50% of water with heavy water is lethal. It’s not a pretty death, either. Heavy water poisoning resembles radiation poisoning or cytotoxic poisoning from chemotherapy.

https://sciencenotes.org/can-you-drink-heavy-water-is-it-safe/

fuck I changed my mind can I do green tea

Bud light. It’s basically alcoholic water.

Maybe truly hard seltzer since it tastes better.

My heart says unsweetened black iced tea, but after a bout of kidney stones I guess I'd have to go with an iced herbal tea. Maybe something minty.

The only thing that is more water than water, Cors light. But now, really I'd prefer to drink my own piss, since coincidentally enough, Cors Light is also one of the few liquid that is more piss than piss.

Lemonsoda

In that case I'd have h2o too

I'll take the large glass of Poison. 1 glass is more than a lifetime supply.

P I S S

Some herbal tea. Mint would probably be best. It's what I drink most of the time anyway.

Dimethylmercury

The most water-like thing I am allowed by your very contrived rules. Maybe water with two slices of cucumber.

Tea.

How different from water does it have to be? Just not in the title?

Because both something like sparkling water and juice are basically water.

But I already pretty much only drink sparkling water so I'll pick that one if it's allowed (if the spirit of your question is "no flat water").

Spezi.