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I tried to usher it out but it decided to play dead.
I believe it's a June Beetle. Does it hiss if you tap its back?
Looks like one of the Polyphylla, a Lined June Beetle.
https://www.inaturalist.org/taxa/84572-Polyphylla
Location would be good though.
That's it! The location also checks out. Thank you, friend.
iNaturalist app is quite good with identifying bugs
It's a cockchafer (I'm not making that name up):
https://www.wildlifetrusts.org/wildlife-explorer/invertebrates/beetles/common-cockchafer
Thank you!
Pretty sure it's in the family of large flying beetles like Giant Fig Eater Beetles. Location is important for identification, you could be almost anywhere in the world.
It's clearly beetle, but that's all I know.
That sir, is a bug