childfree

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I did vasectomy at age of 21 (self.childfree)

submitted 6 months ago by noname_yet2077 to c/childfree

NSFW 28 comments fedilink hide all child comments

Yeah. Year ago I decided to take my money (over $800 including all checkups and gas) and make myself childfree.

Did doctor asked me am I sure? Yes Do I regret it? Hell no!

I had an internal giggle when I saw smoke coming from where my balls are (since procedure was painless)

Sometimes people tell me it wasn't smart, but they have kids so I ignore them.

I really hate the thought of having children :)

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[–] [email protected] 7 points 6 months ago (23 children)

I have a friend who did the same at that age. 10 years later, he and his partner have decided they want kids.

I’m glad that you are happy and sincerely hope that you and your future partners remain happy with this choice for the rest of your life.

For others of your age who might be considering the same, I must say that I do generally discourage making permanent life choices before full frontal lobe development. That is a tome of your life where you’re going through an incredible amount of change, your values and what you want in life might not be the at 21 and 26.

[–] what_was_not_said 3 points 6 months ago (2 children)

Do you think it's appropriate to become pregnant before age 26?

[–] cm0002 4 points 6 months ago (1 children)

Maybe stop trying to attach a number to it, whether or not to have kids is going to be a very personal thing. Instead of "should someone have kids at 21,18,27,30" or whatever

People should be asking themselves the following questions:

Do you want kids?
Is your answer to 1 being pressured by friends, family, this Lemmy community or something else?
Do you feel you are mentally prepared for a child?
Are you financially prepared and stable to have a child? (This one can vary wildly, some people are stable with houses at 18, and some are never financially stable)
Are you prepared to handle your child alone if your support network disappears?

Some people are going to be able check all the boxes at 18/19 some aren't going to be able to until 21 or 30 or maybe even never.

Everyone is going to have to decide for themselves and stop the whole "you shouldn't have kids at X! but not past Y!" Nonsense.

The sole exception is if you're under 18, and that's mostly because you need to finish high school at a bare minimum without distractions otherwise question 4 is going to be a long hard road. Even then the exception has an exception, if you have a well off support network (like wealthy parents)

Like the article posted by the other commenter, you can be mature and ready and wildly varying ages, 25 is a pop culture myth

[–] [email protected] -1 points 6 months ago* (last edited 1 week ago)

I'd add:

1. Are you willing to raise a child that exceeds your expectations, is better than you and is willing to break your mold and work for a better world for everybody, even if that means disagreeing deeply with you?

If you're not, you're contributing to the world going to hell in a hand basket, and you shouldn't procreate.

[–] [email protected] 1 points 6 months ago

I sure don’t!

That qualifies as a permanent life decision before full frontal love development has taken place.

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