Suicide Bereavement

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Suicide Bereavement

A supportive space for anyone bereaved by suicide.

In case of emotional distress, suicidal thoughts, or crisis, please reach out to professionals. Find a local number here.

DO NOT POST ACTIVELY SUICIDAL CONTENT HERE, OR YOU WILL BE PERMANENTLY BANNED. NO EXCEPTIONS. People are here to grieve, be respectful.

Rules

  1. Be nice

  2. This community is exclusively for interpersonal support of people who have lost a loved one to suicide. Any other content will be removed.

  3. No blaming of the dead ones or of the suicide loss-survivors. Covert incitement to suicide falls into this category.

  4. For safety reasons, medication for relieving symptoms of grief should be discussed with your GP or other medical practitioner. Please do not seek or give medical advice in this sub.

  5. We strongly advise against using this sublemmy to observe the impact of suicide on the bereaved.

  6. Researchers and journalists wishing to reach out suicide survivors, or anyone else wishing to survey the community for any reason, must contact the mods prior to posting.

  7. Please send suggested resources to the moderators for inclusion in our official list below - don't post them.

Some selected online resources here

I had thought that your death Was a waste and destruction, A pain of grief hardly to be endured. I am only beginning to learn That your life was a gift, a growing And a loving left with me. The desperation of death Destroyed the existence of love, But the fact of death Cannot destroy what has been given. I am learning to look at your life again Instead of your death and your departing.

Majorie Pizer, The Existence of Love

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Bereavement due to suicide is uniquely difficult; deaths by suicide leave survivors struggling with thoughts that this should have been preventable, that their friend or loved one chose to end their life, and all too often with shame and social stigma instead of the community support that would be forthcoming if the cause of death were anything else.

Here are some links with information and resources:

Huffington Post Living Column: a personal account of grieving her brother's suicide by a psychotherapist

List of normal reactions to suicide loss. From the Canadian Association for Suicide Prevention. A comprehensive list with some entries that may surprise - in a comforting way. This site also offers coping strategies, memorial information, and resources.

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention's "I've Lost Someone" web resources

"Beyond Surviving" at survivorsofsuicide.com - other resources here also. Note that although there is much helpful information available to the general public, membership at this site requires paid registration, albeit at a reasonable rate.

Survivors of Bereavement by Suicide - excellent UK-based resources

Common Experiences with Suicide Bereavement Great info from the SCBS in Australia.

Healing from a Spiteful Suicide Note and the general suicide bereavement survivors section at speakingofsuicide.com

The American Association of Suicidology's bereavement toolkit and resource list

Alliance of Hope for Suicide Survivors A community-oriented resource.

Excellent in-depth article specifically on supporting children bereaved by suicide from Child Bereavement UK.

Thomas Joiner, one of the pre-eminent psychologists working in suicide research today, included a frank and personal account of his experience of losing his own father to suicide interwoven throughout his book Why People Die by Suicide, Harvard University Press, 2005. The book overall is not specifically intended for those bereaved by suicide, but it may be helpful to those who feel that a better understanding of what's known about suicide in general will help them in their recovery.

If you're supporting someone else who's been bereaved by suicide, this guide from the NSPA in the UK might be helpful.