syncretik

What is the goal? To escape mental habits and tendencies which have become excessively ingrained and therefore mistaken as aspects of reality as opposed to modes of perception. The goal is to be open to all possible perspectives and experiences including those radically different from the ordinary human experience.

The goal is to cease to be a human? You’ve never been a human. The goal is to cease believing that you are a human.

Why is it preferable to cease believing you are a human? Firstly, because it is incorrect. Secondly, because the human body is limited. It will suffer, age, and then die. You will undergo all of these experiences and they will be painful, unless you realize that they are not happening to you, you are merely experiencing their happening. It is essential to come to hold the right view about the nature of your experiences.

What is the right view? The right view is to understand one’s experiences exactly as they are, to penetrate their nature. Right view is to perceive the physical world as a dream, a fabrication, an illusion, not ultimately real. This means one drops the beliefs they hold in normal, waking life about the nature of their experiences (i.e. as happening in a real, physical, external world) and adopts another. Right view is distinct from wrong view, or the conventional human mode of consciousness, in the same way that a painter presented with an apple would react differently (on instinct, immediately, without contemplation) than a starving man: phenomena are perceived in an entirely different way, despite being, superficially, the same phenomena. Right view is when the understanding of subjective idealism is consciously evident in the nature of one’s experiences. This is the difference between understanding “I’m typing on my keyboard right now” and “I’m experiencing Utthana typing on his keyboard right now” and having such an understanding as it is happening.

That's a nice concept in theory, but maintaining that mode of experiencing all day is an act of meditative endeavor. How is this achievable? It’s true that this is to be attained through right mindfulness, or right meditation, which is an endeavor. But constant endeavor is necessary to be ultimately flexible.

Wait, why is it desirable to be ultimately flexible? One who is flexible, adaptable, and comfortable with all experiences is immortal, invulnerable, and infinitely powerful. One who is ultimately flexible is one who is open to all possible experiences.

This now seems even more daunting! The ability to instantly, attentively, alertly, and consciously respond to each experience individually and uniquely is what it is to be enlightened. This requires a mind (“The Beginner’s Mind”) which is open, unattached, and pliable, accommodating to every farthest reach of conceivable experience. The mind must not be dull, unaware, lost in thought, lost in action, “being human”, full absorbed in the physical world and taking it to be real, in a “normal state”.

What does this have to do with mindfulness or meditation? Only when one is attentive to every possible type of experience can one be expected to react to, and respond to, each with the full alertness, attention, and conscious awareness to be ultimately flexible. If you are not aware of each experience you are having as it is, you will never be able to respond to each skillfully and with an open heart. You will, instead, fall back into old patterns and default, human ways of perceiving things (i.e. physicalism).

So how is this to be achieved? Only by being constantly vigilant can this be achieved. One must arouse one’s self to full attention of the experience that one is undergoing according to the Right View. This is the difference between being able to say, “I just walked across the room,” and having been intensely aware of the fact that you were experiencing yourself walking across the room during each instant of your walking.

This still sounds like a strenuous meditative endeavor. Am I expected to be completely alert to my experiences all day and every day? Yes. The normal, waking mode of consciousness is when one is capable of discussing subjective idealism theoretically but, for fifteen hours a day, experiences itself as human, busy with tasks, mind not fully aware of the nature of one’s experiences but instead lost in interaction, conversation, and the physical world. The mode of consciousness that is desired is when one is, instead, constantly aware and alert to the nature of their experiences, ultimately flexible, not lost in thought or busy with tasks, not experiencing itself as human. Every minute, every hour, every day, every lifetime not spent completely alert and attentive is a minute, hour, day, or lifetime spent ingraining conventional habits.

Is the maintenance of such a state not exhausting? No. The samsaric state of being lost in ordinary thoughts is where we are comfortable, and it is a strain and difficulty to become constantly aware and alert. But this is not a perpetual endeavor, like a mental task of thinking of the same mantra over and over, day in and day out forever. This is a shift from one natural resting place for the mind to another. Once one “gets into the habit” of perceiving reality with full attention and awareness and not allowing the mind to get lost, remaining in such a state becomes as natural as remaining in the normal, waking mode of consciousness is to us now. The alert, awake mode of consciousness can become how one wakes up, the mode one defaults to in events of trial and trauma (including death), and even how one dreams.

Never mind maintaining it, how does one initially get into such a state, or return to such a state after one has relapsed to the normal, physicalist perception? There are many ways. Intense and prolonged contemplation on right view is often sufficient to induce the shift in the character of experiences, but the practice is not entirely 'passive'. Meditation or drugs, when done by one who has firmly grasped the right view, can induce this shift. Active and intentional magickal practices can be exceptionally powerful tools as well. But the real trial lies in the maintenance of right view and right mindfulness throughout all of life. The difference between one who theoretically understands wisdom for a few hours of the day, and one who lives with wisdom even in their dreams, is the effort undertaken to maintain that state of consciousness. Being intensely aware of one's experiences exactly as they are happening, in the context of a latent understanding of right view (subjective idealism), and maintaining such a state, is all that is necessary.

A practical exploration, in terms of having the experiences we want:

“When I know what I want in this world, when I am thinking of it, it is always beyond me. When I know what I want, I enter into that state and think from it.” - Neville Goddard

I often find myself in the former, with the experience I desire out of my reach. Quite frustrating.

One night, I was somehow accidentally able to think from it with ease. It was surprisingly simple to do, like something hidden in plain sight all along. It was less of a lateral move - just imagining or visualizing over top of this moment, as I usually do. It was more like my awareness moved up in time, I was less so 'here', and everything was being drawn towards it. A great sense of ease. I'd like to practice this.

Perhaps some of you are familiar with this or have some insights on the subject?

edit: I suppose 'thinking from' could be seen under the umbrella of detachment, letting go.

In the context of subjective idealism all the various concrete experiences are unable to supply any kind of final meaning. Such experiences are hypothetical or suggestive, which means they fail to bring any kind of conclusiveness or finality to the narrative. And yet the narrative must flow subjectively. So what is it then that dots all the i's in one's own subjective sphere? That would be one's own volition.

And generally there are two major ways to structure one's volition, and we could provisionally call them 'source' and 'destination.' A 'source' is a set of some hypothetical principles one takes as one's axioms in life. This doesn't have to be conscious or enunciated to be effective. In fact some of the strongest possible axioms might function tacitly. Take for example an axiom that no two objects may occupy the same space. Did your mother and father ever have to teach you that? Axioms such as these are necessary volitional preconditions before one can attempt to have an experience of the conventional world as we now know it. If I thought that everything I know about in this room is also in the same exact space rather than scattered through space, I'd have a drastically different perception of phenomenal reality.

And a 'destination' is one's ideal vision, the best possible scenario, toward which one strives. As with the source this can fall at any point within the conscious-unconscious continuum. This too affects the state of one's volition. One's destination may take one's source axioms as acceptable or necessary, or it may seek to modify the source axioms. So a physicalist who strives to overcome one's own physicalism is in that latter category. In this case one's source axioms are that of physicalism, but one's ideal life lies beyond the confines of physicalism.

If one doesn't have a specific destination then one is an aimless drifter for whom the only constant are the voluntarily axiomatic principles of the source.

Generally the sorts of beings we meet have mentalities that overlap our own. So we know that generally the mentalities of others resemble our own because of the fact that when they express something through speech or the movements of the body, we can relate. We understand what they want to tell us. We can usually easily imagine ourselves saying similar things or expressing similar bodily forms. That's because we share all the same core assumptions, for the most part. There are some exceptions here, such as for example a profoundly autistic person who may live in a parallel dimension without the slightest way to communicate. In some cases I am fortunate to hear about people like Daniel Tammet who lives in a world significantly different from mine, but who can tell me about his world in a way I can sort of understand. Of course I can barely imagine what it's like to be Daniel even after reading his books.

It's important to realize when I talk in this way I don't mean to imply these dimensions are necessarily real. Once I can conceive of such dimensions, I can relate to them as real. Or I can relate to them as unreal. The choice is mine and subjective idealism respects that choice.

However, because destination is something that's not yet the case, precisely because it's a personal teleology, there is no strong pressure for that to be the same for everyone. Thus destination can be highly divergent for people and the world is not going to lose any of its seeming coherence because of that. Divergence in destination is something that's postponed and so doesn't need to be resolved and made coherent right now.

And this brings me to my first main point. For a subjective idealist such as myself the differences in bodies and mundane qualities are not all that interesting. Do you have two arms or one arm? Is your body's skin this or that color? Is your hair like this or like that? All such differences are boring, and because of that, do not form the most interesting element of one's personal identity for me. Instead the most interesting difference between all the people I encounter is their destination, their personal teleology. This is also expressed in a question: "What are your highest aspirations?" Or "What is your dream?" Or "What is your vision of ideal life?"

Paying attention to the differences in people's highest aspirations shines a very bright light on the non-obvious qualities of people. A person whose highest hope is to raise a family in the context of a life on Earth as understood from a physicalist framework is what I'd call an "ordinary person." This sort of person is not someone I regard as a peer. Someone whose personal aspirations are out of this world is someone who is eligible to deserve my special consideration and there is a chance I may consider such one a peer. Try to imagine yourself saying this in the 1st person POV instead of imagining someone saying it to you from a 2nd person POV.

Of course people generally don't go around announcing their highest aspirations, but this often becomes evident by paying careful attention to what they say and do, when, how, etc.

And finally I want to clarify an important point about what it means for an aspiration to be "highest."

One's highest aspiration may have its maturation "date" far in the vision of the future, but it weighs heavily and dominates every thought and deed right now. So it's essential not to be confused and deceived by someone who wants to become enlightened after 100 lives with a kind of "maybe later" procrastinating attitude. So "highest aspiration" does not mean an aspriation one is comfortable postponing the most!! Far from it! The opposite is the case. So a long visionary time frame can suggest a grandness of vision or it can suggest an immense degree of procrastination and postponing. There is a crucial difference between the first and the second quality!

The highest aspiration is one with a potentially extended maturation date (speaking of time in a visionary sense), but what makes it "highest" is that it is most pressing right now, one that guides and inspires the most right now. So a person for whom enlightenment is their highest aspiration is going to accept that they might not be fully enlightened in this lifetime but will think and behave as if this is the only chance they have to become enlightened and as if there will be no other chances later. In other words, there will be zero procrastination and the priorities will all fall in line in such a way that the highest aspiration becomes uppermost.

I was using "enlightenment" only as an example. I believe there are all sorts of excellent aspirations that transcend and surpass the human ideals in beautiful ways.

There are two polar complementary dimensions of experience: tolerance and expressiveness. When one's tolerance has been perfected there is no urgency to modify any experience to be something else, no matter what that experience may feel like. When one's expressiveness has been perfected, one regains the knowledge and the courage necessary to exercise intent along its full range of ultimate possibility, thus being able to manifest any experience that could be experienced even in principle. This second perfection we know as magick.

If you cultivate tolerance without expressiveness you'll be like a patient victim, able to endure but passive and lacking creativity. And if you cultivate expressiveness without tolerance, you'll be like a perpetually frightened maestro for whom magick is not a leisurely pleasure but a dire necessity at every turn in life.

May you all be twice perfect.

Talk more casually about SI here without having to make a formal post.

This forum is primarily dedicated to higher quality posts and discussions. Those are welcome from everyone but will be filtered by the moderators. In order to foster more discussion, we have decided to start a weekly stickied discussion thread for the subreddit. This discussion thread is a place for people to post things that are more casual regarding subjective idealism, and things that are more exploratory. Here is a place for individuals to propose ideas and ask questions and figure out subjective idealism.

This is just a thought experiment. I hope some of you find it as fun as I have this morning.

There is a common movie trope where the character becomes a ghost, and this is depicted when the character's body passes through the apparent objects of the world, and when nobody can hear and respond to the character, but the character can still see the apparent world with people in it.

Now here's the question.

What is the ghost here? Is the character the ghost? Or is the world the ghost? If you wanted to make a movie about the whole world becoming a ghost while the character remaining real, how would you depict it?

What's interesting is how well the movie trope works. I figure 99.99% of the viewers upon seeing a character's hand passing through the table conclude, instantly, the character is a ghost, but the world isn't one. This is evidence of bias.

A Teaching from the Shadows

This teaching is a non-teaching. This is ornamentation. This is a web of lies and confusion. Don't trust me. Turn back now.

This teaching can awaken you. This is no mere joke. Study this daily until your world is soaked in darkness. You cannot understand the mind unless you understand all its aspects: the light AND the dark.

The fundamental nature of reality is vile, smoking, destructive hate. Hate is the reason beings must kill and torture and feast upon one another to survive this dream. Hate is the reason the source of all life is a raging hell in the sky. All things must be destroyed. Nothing is eternal but you and your suffering. This is God's punishment to you for no crimes committed. Because God doesn't love you. He hates you. No matter how wonderful an experience you create, inevitably you become bored of it and suffer. There is no final escape hatch. There is no nirvana. Nirvana is another sort of hell. Only when you see that heaven too is hell will you be free. What a wretched mystery is this!

The world is an endless series of struggles, pain, obstacles, failures: timeless suffering. And Thank God! Thank God for hating you. Without hate and suffering, there is only sickly stagnation. Pain is your teacher and hate your mentor. Hate is the reason people choose to overcome their parasitic environments and become something great. Without strife and struggle you become weak. You become soft and fragile. Imagine if God loved you! You'd be so sensitive that even taking a shit without holding God's hand would send you into a fit. Without the wisdom and power born from hate, you would be a soft, ignorant fool. Easy to push around and easier to trick. Some other greater being born from the fires of hell would quickly make you his thrall.

But then what is love? Baby hurt me. Love is a kind of hatred. Love is how fun games become deadly serious. Love is a hatred of pain. Love is a hatred of struggle and conflict. Love is hatred of hate. Self-hatred. Love is hatred that has become deeply confused. If you love something you can be sure you will bring it to ruin. If you are loved, then be wary of the hatred your lover must have for you to bring such ruin to you.

If you understand these words then you know that enlightenment is born from suffering so bad that you are shaken out of your sleep and remember that this terrible game is just a game. So what is the obvious imperative for those foolish ones who wish to help bring enlightenment to others? Cruelty. The more misery your comrades feel, the greater pressure they feel to wake up. Become a demon and feed all beings as much suffering as you can muster. Free them of their chains by making this prison so unbearable that they break their chains out of desperation - because only they can break their chains. This is why the true Bodhisattva is a demon.

From desire comes struggle.

From struggle comes power.

From power comes victory.

The mind will set me free.

Forget what you have read. Don't even comment. Leave this place now before your mind is clouded with darkness. Only the most advanced practitioners are suited to read and understand these words.

A Teaching from the Light

This teaching is safe for all practitioners. Read this carefully and contemplate the meaning of these words. You cannot see the whole picture without understanding the dark AND the light.

The fundamental nature of reality is beautiful, glowing, harmonious love. Rocks are attracted to the Earth and rush to rejoin it in orgiastic union. Fire is drawn up to unite with the fiery heavens. All of creation is a love affair. Reality is a society and all society is a sexuality. One who sees the erotic in everything knows divine love.

Creation is a beginningless dance. You and your bliss are eternal. This is the goddess's grace to you despite all your mistakes. Absolute forgiveness. Know that the goddess doesn't hate you, she loves you. There is pure love and joy but we attach ourselves to worldly, selfish ends, and keep ourselves anchored in a sea of suffering. The goddess is waiting for you to return to loving union with her. In your heart of hearts, you and the goddess are already one but you've forgotten that because you're so caught up in your ego, your human game, and its daily sufferings. No matter how bad things get, your loving bliss is always by your side if only you will turn to it. Nirvana is with you everywhere and at all times. You always play games because you think it will be fun. There is something in every game to enjoy. In this way you can understand that every hell is a kind of heaven. Infinite bliss and life hides in this mystery!

What then is hate? Hate is love gone awry. Hate is a form of love rooted in forgetfulness of unity. Hate is love resting on the ignorance of separation. Hate is unconscious love. When the light of consciousness is brought to hate, it dissolves like a shadow in light and is revealed as a form of ignorant love.

When you understand the nature of light and love, you will know that there is nothing that need be done. You don't need to atone for your sins or struggle for aeons. Right here right now is timeless joy if you'll only open your spiritual eyes. The dream around you is sick with suffering. How can you bring healing to the world around you if you don't heal yourself? How can you love others if you don't first love yourself? Change your consciousness, and your whole dream will follow you into heaven. Become an angel and heal yourself, others, and your world.

Peace over desire.

Harmony over strife.

Love over hate.

There is no death, there is the mind.

The Greater Teaching Beyond Shadow and Light

Light and shadow are both unreal phenomena. When you look at an object and it's colors are what we conventionally designate as 'brighter' you tend to think the object is under lighting. When that same object later appears as colors we conventionally designate as 'darker', you tend to think the object is under shadow or darkness. We conceptualize that there is a function called a light source which shifts the apparent colors of objects brighter around it, and that this brightening source affects objects in straight lines away from itself. It's perfectly imaginable that the brightness and darkness of the colors of objects might be untied from the idea of light and sources of light entirely. There are infinite possibilities. Use your imagination. Maybe things are always bright but get dark when they are near jewels. Or some positions on earth are bright and others are dark for all objects all the time. Or maybe there are no consistent effects on brightness and darkness at all, and instead some 'sources' make objects near more blue and others make objects more red. Or maybe nothing influences the colors of objects and things always remain the same. Our maybe vision isn't even a part of some exotic mode of cognition.

So light and dark are totally constructed illusions. To say that the fundamental nature of vision is only light or only dark is to be exceptionally confused. Certainly theories of vision which frame light or dark as more fundamental can be fabricated. But these are mental fabrications projected by a dreaming mind beyond both light and dark. It is beyond because it is capable of both. The mind is the potential to be light or dark and so much more. To take either as real or primary is to be embedded in ignorance.

So let's set aside this confused idea that metaphysically prioritizes light over dark or love over hate (I think we should also set aside views that metaphysically prioritize dark over light or hate over love, but that doesn't seem to be so common). The fundamental nature of reality is a little more nuanced than that. Better to be a shapeshifter capable of being an angel, a demon, and anything else rather than trapped forever as just an angel or a demon.

I was lurking on some old threads and something caught my attention on a previous discussion we had here. I seek more clarity around the subject. Copy pasting below :

mindseal: Those rules set up by the dream.

mindseal : Dreams do not set up any rules. The dreamers do. However, if the dreamer is not conscious of having set up any rules, they cannot deliberately change those rules either.

therewasguy: There is no reason for the world to be defined in anyway like sun having light properties or so. Imagine a world where even a rock has lighting properties or the water containing land like properties. Their's no reason why anything is the way it is

mindseal: There is no objective reason, but there is a reason. The reason is your will as the dreamer. It's your will as the dreamer of this dream that makes the water wet and land solid. If you're not conscious of this you cannot deliberately mess around with any such so-called "natural laws."

therewasguy: our very host of whatever we are in, makes us think we're separate from everything else

mindseal : No, it's not a host. It's you. Don't look up. Look within. You are not a human being. You're humaning, but aren't a human. At least from the POV of subjective idealism that's true, and that's what we are here to discuss.

Can the Law of attraction dream constant be broken and be changed to something else in this dream?

To me from my understanding, I feel as if the law of attraction has been very dominant into my life, I guess it's from how I've bridged my beliefs for it to be very true. I'm wondering if it's possible to turn it off and change/will it to work otherwise? I've tried to contemplate this for awhile but i seem to be stuck within myself. I would like some guidance aid. Thanks.

Why do lucid dreams at the height of their development seem so amazing? One big reason for this is that lucid dreams give many experienced lucid dreamers a preview of what it's like to be God. As you learn to bend reality in your dream, and as you get better and better at not only playing a role in your dream, but also at being an indisputable and tyrannical conductor of the entire dream, you approach Godliness.

The power of lucidity is not a democracy. It is absolute tyranny. This is why when I want to have sex in my dreams, when I am lucid, there is no discussion or debate about it. The first girl I see is hot, and that's no accident, and I take her hand, and she wants to fuck me as much as I want to fuck her. Why does this happen? Why is it so flawless? That's because I understand the meaning of true tyranny and in my dreams I allow myself to feel this in a way I don't yet allow myself to feel during waking.

True tyranny is divine. When it is exercised, the subjects don't feel oppressed. They feel like they want to do whatever it is you want to do. It feels voluntary through and through. There is no resistance. It is instant and flawless. There is no adjustment or fine-tuning. Things turn out to be magically always right the first time, seemingly beyond any reason.

The way to learn to feel this way in your dreams is to disregard all facts. Whatever dream situation appears to your mind, a typical, conventional attitude would be to take the apparent situation as fact, as evidence of something. This is why most dreamers who are accustomed to relating to their senses as avenues of evidence, they also fall prey to their dream environments and become victims of the circumstances in their own dreams. Then the dream monster as presented by the 5 senses is evidence of a real monster that really wants to get you. And then if people resist your advances or ideas, that's taken as evidence that your point of view is not absolute, and that you must contend with something besides yourself "out there." To overcome this victim trap, upon lucidity you have to instantly disregard everything you witness. You have to realize that nothing in the sphere of the 5 senses is a fact. You're witnessing only a one possibility out of an infinity of possibilities. To a lucid dreamer all configurations of sense bases are no longer factual or evidential. They're just accidental and they're subject to volition and to imagination. What is becomes subjugated by what could be.

This frame of mind is radically anti-conservative. A conservative frame of mind is to always preserve appearances and to always resist "what could be." That's why conservatives always look to history for inspiration. To a conservative mindset "what is" is also "how it always was" and also "how it always will be."

To take the lucid advantage to a waking consciousness you have to do something very much similar during waking. Stop relying on facts. Stop relying on evidence. Claim your divinity. Don't ask for permission. Just do it. Don't be reasonable about it. There is no one and nothing you would need to reason with. Reasoning is still a subtle act of asking for a permission. When we reason, we want the faculty of reason to agree before we engage in something. From the POV of a deity, the faculty of reason will become your slave. Your reason will be there to explain in ways that others will find impossible to argue with, why what you want to do is reasonable, when in truth you just do what you want to do, and that's that. Reason then becomes like a corrupt lawyer who is tirelessly working to keep your wishes safe and you entertained, and if you are resolute, then even an army of 100 million philosophers working together will not prove anything wrong.

When you try maintain an attitude and a frame of mind of a deity during waking, it may so happen that it will be overwhelming. That's because we have so much stuff in our past, and the past is not just "past." The past is present in our mind right now, and it is held there deliberately by intent, because it was valuable at least at one time, and if nothing else, it gives us a sense of continuity of identity, continuity to which we tend to cling. Who wants to become a being with no history? Not even personal history?

So when you move powerfully against convention, what happens is you might feel pain in your body. That's because your body is a shadow of your past. The correct attitude at this point is to regard such pain as helpful. This pain is not a "message from the universe to stop." It's the same thing as when you feel pain from lifting weights. When you lift weights, and you're not accustomed to it, your body will ache. That isn't a message that you're doing something wrong. It's only a signal that what you're doing is not something you are accustomed to.

Further, regard any possibility of injury on this path as wonderful. Convention can't grab hold of your mind or intent. They can strike out at your body and nothing else. Then tell your body, "If you, my arm, allow yourself to be taken by the others, you were never my ally to begin with. You are a traitor. You may go. You are a weakness. Losing you is nothing more than losing weakness. Losing you is nothing more than losing a disease. If others should take you, go, go, go." Accept only those parts of your being which are committed to your cause. And be ready and willing to let go of any parts that are not. Jesus was talking about this when he said something like "if your eye sins, rip it out." Basically, your ordinary bodies are traitorous to your deepest wishes if your wishes involve transcendence and divinity of any kind. Do not be fooled. Do not grieve.

There is nothing in the entire universe that keeps it going outside of your own constant and unremitting commitment. Once your commitment to the universe authentically and genuinely comes to an end, the universe will dissolve like an illusion that it always and ever was.

When a relatively normal person returns to a world of solidity after experiencing something amazing, what happens? Why the return? Is there something that forces such a return? Think about it. If you resolve to never return, what could possibly force you? It would have to be your own idea and your own commitment to the externality of the universe. It would have to be your own love and desire for the universe. It would have to be you.

People don't realize this, but they energize and power every little piece of garbage in their lives by their own love and life juice. Reawakening the memory that you really are God is all about restoring that love and life juice back to yourself. It's a universal reset. It's you, as God, saying, "Enough is enough, I will not play this game anymore. If the Universe wants to do it, it will need to find its own strength and energy to do it. I am out." And what do you know? Once you're out, you'll discover universe was empty and hollow and it has nothing in it that was powering it from the outside of your being.

When you maintain a deific attitude for even one month, you'll realize how much bullshit you used to believe that isn't really true. Conventional thinking will begin to stick out so vividly and obviously. Things you would take for granted will gradually begin to sound absurd. It's a period of great discovery.

There is much more that can be said about this. I could write a book about being a diety. But this is just a reddit post.

Your innermost heart is brilliant beyond brilliance and steady beyond steady. It is calm. It is perfectly poised. It is all-capable. It is invincible. It is a repository of all possible virtue and all possible health. You can consider this proposition in a lively manner, without any dead rote, but really considering it sincerely as if hearing it for the first time each time you consider it.

As you do so, you can hold your two hands together and put them comfortably in front of you. It's essential to deliberately focus on the softest and mildest feelings. Something subtle can be very powerful. A whisper of a feeling can overwhelm something that roars when you feed it with your attention and love. So as you hold your two hands together, feel the softness and kindness of your left hand seep into your right, and the softness and kindness of your right hand seep into your left. There is no need to make it a strong feeling. The key for this type of exercise is subtlety. It can be a subtle but very distinct and noticeable feeling. It may start to feel warm and comfortable, and soft kindness will glow in your hands.

When soft kindness glows in your hands, you can allow it to gradually expand by feeling the very same thing you feel in your hands all over your body. When this happens remember your true innermost heart. Consider how invincible, calm, steady your innermost heart is. It is like the starry sky at night. There is no agitation in it at all, and it is your innermost core.

I was walking around in a park and decided to apply a transformation to my experience when I kept hearing an annoying siren that just wouldn't shut up.

As soon as I decided that, the siren started to get quieter, with some subtle ups and downs in volume, but trending downward in volume. But this wasn't happening fast enough for my liking. So I was then focusing this way and that, and I was adjusting my mentality like this and like that to make it go faster. And then it struck me.

It struck me that the reason I was doing that is because on some level I was still assuming that magick is something objective, and then it was my job to find the one right way to do it. I had to match my activity to something I imagined to be objectively the most effective way of performing a transformation.

Then I realized the idiocy of that belief and I found it funny how I still continued to believe it on some level even though I know better. I'm not even sure I've learned my lesson. It's entirely possible the next time some transformation doesn't work fast enough, I'll be trying to "tune" it, lol. I hope not. At minimum I shouldn't tune anything with the idea that I'm matching what I am doing to some external unbending and eternal standard.