this post was submitted on 12 Dec 2023
795 points (97.7% liked)

Lemmy Shitpost

26909 readers
5402 users here now

Welcome to Lemmy Shitpost. Here you can shitpost to your hearts content.

Anything and everything goes. Memes, Jokes, Vents and Banter. Though we still have to comply with lemmy.world instance rules. So behave!


Rules:

1. Be Respectful


Refrain from using harmful language pertaining to a protected characteristic: e.g. race, gender, sexuality, disability or religion.

Refrain from being argumentative when responding or commenting to posts/replies. Personal attacks are not welcome here.

...


2. No Illegal Content


Content that violates the law. Any post/comment found to be in breach of common law will be removed and given to the authorities if required.

That means:

-No promoting violence/threats against any individuals

-No CSA content or Revenge Porn

-No sharing private/personal information (Doxxing)

...


3. No Spam


Posting the same post, no matter the intent is against the rules.

-If you have posted content, please refrain from re-posting said content within this community.

-Do not spam posts with intent to harass, annoy, bully, advertise, scam or harm this community.

-No posting Scams/Advertisements/Phishing Links/IP Grabbers

-No Bots, Bots will be banned from the community.

...


4. No Porn/ExplicitContent


-Do not post explicit content. Lemmy.World is not the instance for NSFW content.

-Do not post Gore or Shock Content.

...


5. No Enciting Harassment,Brigading, Doxxing or Witch Hunts


-Do not Brigade other Communities

-No calls to action against other communities/users within Lemmy or outside of Lemmy.

-No Witch Hunts against users/communities.

-No content that harasses members within or outside of the community.

...


6. NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.


-Content that is NSFW should be behind NSFW tags.

-Content that might be distressing should be kept behind NSFW tags.

...

If you see content that is a breach of the rules, please flag and report the comment and a moderator will take action where they can.


Also check out:

Partnered Communities:

1.Memes

2.Lemmy Review

3.Mildly Infuriating

4.Lemmy Be Wholesome

5.No Stupid Questions

6.You Should Know

7.Comedy Heaven

8.Credible Defense

9.Ten Forward

10.LinuxMemes (Linux themed memes)


Reach out to

All communities included on the sidebar are to be made in compliance with the instance rules. Striker

founded 1 year ago
MODERATORS
 
top 50 comments
sorted by: hot top controversial new old
[–] [email protected] 95 points 11 months ago (3 children)

She needs to watch French movies where they always have a baguette sticking out of their grocery bag.

[–] AlmightySnoo 53 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] jaybone 13 points 11 months ago (2 children)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 29 points 11 months ago (2 children)

It's always a baguette and some celery

[–] [email protected] 27 points 11 months ago (1 children)
[–] TseseJuer 10 points 11 months ago

shes leekin, baguette

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] synapse1278 78 points 11 months ago (1 children)

This bagette doesn't look lovely nor fresh

[–] naun 27 points 11 months ago (13 children)

If it's in that kind of bag (with little holes in it), it was definitely freshly baked that day. That kind of bag is designed to keep the bread crispy, but it can only be used on the day it was baked, or the bread will become hard as rock the next day. If a loaf is going to be kept and sold the next day, it has to be rebagged into a solid plastc bag to keep it fresh. "Lovely" is subjective. It's a grocery store baguette.

load more comments (13 replies)
[–] [email protected] 71 points 11 months ago (3 children)

So? Do you usually eat the baguette as a whole, deepthroating the thing or what?

[–] [email protected] 31 points 11 months ago (1 children)

How else do I prepare for my sword swallowing competition

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 18 points 11 months ago

Does smoosh the shit out of about 20% of the loaf. Definitely a bummer.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 63 points 11 months ago (1 children)

+1 point for bending it half

+10 points if she used her knee

[–] [email protected] 26 points 11 months ago (1 children)

+20 if she blew smoke in your face and told you to get out

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 61 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (3 children)

I'm sorry the title joke was stolen from beard_necessities_of_life on insta. Hbomberguy video has me scared of plagiarism

[–] camr_on 40 points 11 months ago

You've done it now. I can't wait for the 7 hour exposé on your crimes

[–] [email protected] 14 points 11 months ago (1 children)

So? It's not like you're gonna get banned here, lol 😂.

[–] FMT99 27 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Who knows? That hbomberguy is relentless.

load more comments (1 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 52 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (1 children)

Pretty sure the baguette still works.

Personally, I tend to eat half by the time I get to the car, so I would consider this good customer service.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 51 points 11 months ago (9 children)

I think I'm too european to understand this meme

[–] AnUnusualRelic 14 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Plastic wrapped baguette??

[–] [email protected] 36 points 11 months ago (18 children)

That's weird as well, but what I meant is in Europe you pack your groceries yourself

[–] bitwaba 29 points 11 months ago (3 children)

This OP picture is from somewhere in Europe. "Till" is the English word, while Americans would say something like cash register or check out counter. And SPAR is a European chain of grocery stores

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (17 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
[–] FlyingSquid 11 points 11 months ago

Oddly enough, most American supermarkets put every baguette they bake that day (if they bake it that day) in plastic bags. Although in this case, I believe they mean that they broke the baguette in the plastic bag in half so it would fit in the bag with the rest of the groceries.

load more comments (7 replies)
[–] cosmicrookie 38 points 11 months ago (19 children)

Never understood (or experienced) having my purchases bagged for me when I do groceries

[–] [email protected] 16 points 11 months ago (9 children)

From the grocery store's perspective, at least in the US, it keeps the checkout lines moving way faster when some kid who is trained to bag groceries does it, rather than waiting for the customer to figure out how to pack it.

[–] [email protected] 22 points 11 months ago (1 children)

All grocery stores where I live have this device consisting of swivelling plank separating the packing area into two. If someone is slow at bagging the clerk will simply move the plank and all groceries go into the second half where the second person can bag them. It gives the first person time to bag and the next customer again has their groceries place in the first half.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] cosmicrookie 12 points 11 months ago

You say this, but it never seems to be an issue here. Its a cultural thing i guess but people seem to manage without

load more comments (7 replies)
load more comments (18 replies)
[–] [email protected] 32 points 11 months ago (1 children)

unbroken baguettes are a privilege of those who use reusable bags and bag their own groceries

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] gaiussabinus 22 points 11 months ago

Step 1) Establish dominance with the customer

[–] thorbot 18 points 11 months ago (1 children)

First world problems. I wouldn't give a shit because I am cutting that thing up anyway.

load more comments (1 replies)
[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago
[–] pastabatman 14 points 11 months ago (3 children)

My first thought when I saw this post was, "That's not a baguette, that's french bread." I never connected that the gigantic long bread at the store with the stale dry crust that they label as "french bread" is supposed to be a baguette, which is French. Like they are too ashamed to actually call it a baguette because it kind of sucks but that's definitely what it's supposed to be.

Is french bread a regional thing in the US?

load more comments (3 replies)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago (1 children)

I mean, how else are you gonna make the sandwich anyway?

[–] dingus 22 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Wait...you mean you're telling me you don't deepthroat your entire baguette in one bite???

[–] captain_oni 15 points 11 months ago

So there are people out there that don't unhinge their jaw to eat an entire sub, olive-on-a-toothpick included?

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] Nariom 13 points 11 months ago (1 children)

As a french baguette amateur I can confirm this is how you pack a traditional industrial baguette.

[–] SkyezOpen 9 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Industrial baguette would break you, not the other way around

load more comments (2 replies)
[–] [email protected] 13 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Life pro tip, never eat the middle part of a baguette in France

[–] TheBERFA 11 points 11 months ago (1 children)

Were you gonna expand on that?

[–] [email protected] 21 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago) (4 children)
[–] EnderMB 15 points 11 months ago (3 children)

I don't know, in a world where people will pay for a jar of some egirls bath water, I'm willing to bet that someone would pay extra for a nibble on some moist armpit baguette.

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (3 replies)
[–] Sorgan71 12 points 11 months ago (2 children)

Where I come from they'd tie her limbs to 3 horses and have the horses run away from each other.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 11 months ago (3 children)

Which horse gets two limbs?

[–] [email protected] 17 points 11 months ago (3 children)

That is such an ableist comment omg

load more comments (3 replies)
load more comments (2 replies)
load more comments (1 replies)
[–] Daft_ish 10 points 11 months ago* (last edited 11 months ago)

This lady sounds mad. I'd be impressed at how real that cashier is keeping it.

load more comments
view more: next ›