I know it sounds like common sense, but I think a lot of us grew up with parents that made us finish our food even if we weren’t hungry. So eating more than we needed was normalized, and it became difficult to just stop mid meal.
this post was submitted on 20 Oct 2023
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Growing up with not much also conditioned you to eat everything on the off chance you can get a full meal. This has been a point of contention with my SO several times. They came from a well off family and they have no problem not finishing their food or not using some ingredients in the fridge whereas I've been conditioned to finish all meals no matter what and to be able to use up everything (not letting stuff expire) stored in the fridge.
Strong "you can't let good food go to waste" in the post-war generation, including in my own family. It's so ingrained even in the next generations that many of us will just "finish their plate" even though there's no necessity there. Some of us are quite well off now, but attitudes around food haven't changed. You have to finish your plate. You can't let good food go to waste. People elsewhere are starving. People worked hard so you could have this food. You don't know when you'll be able to have a nice meal like this again.
Like you, I realized the difference when I met people from different, well off, culturally food-secure backgrounds. They'd just stop eating, and throw the uneaten leftovers in the trash. Doesn't matter how good the food was. Doesn't matter how expensive the food was. Doesn't matter that you could eat the leftovers later.
I had a really hard time landing on some reasonable middle ground (you can save leftovers, but you're allowed to stop eating when you're full, etc.). Made me realize that it's so much more cultural than personal. Also raises questions about what we're going to pass down to the next generations, intentionally or not.
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I was abused as a kid and while it stopped when I was 9 cause my grandmother got custody of me I still eat as much as I have. Im 23 that shit can get in deep.
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Yeah, seems obvious but when your entire childhood is filled with shame because "there are starving kids in Africa so finish your plate", it's not so simple. Or when you realize that eating is the basically the only joy you have in life, it's not so simple. Or when you have to take medications for your mental health and the side effects are that you over eat, it's not so simple. Or when you have no time to exercise bc both you and your wife have to work to afford anything in this stupid economy, it's not so simple.
Simple doesn't mean easy. Running a marathon is simple, you just keep running until you get there. Yet the majority can't do it.
For each of the scenarios you presented, there is a simple solution:
- "there are starving kids in Africa so finish your plate" - put less food on your plate
- eating is the basically the only joy you have - expand your hobbies to find meaning elsewhere
- medication... side effects - count calories
- no time to exercise bc both you and your wife have to work - make exercise part of your commute
Each of those are simple solutions, but they aren't easy to implement. I get it, I don't do the above nearly as much as I should; I know what I should do, but actually doing them is another story.
Keep it up, you can do it. :)
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Quantity of food: weight. Quality of food: health. Remember you can still get diabetes being slim. Also I guess health can be quantity if you become morbidly obese.
Don't stop when you're full. Stop when you no longer feel hungry.
I like this a lot. The stopping when full thing has helped, but your recommendation seems better. It may require a higher level of mindfulness and self control, but so be it.
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Fat people hate this one simple trick.
There are definitely high calorie low weight food out there that will make you exceed your calorie count without you feeling full.
That’s when you use your evolved prefrontal cortex and stop eating the fried chicken anyway because you’ve already had three pieces.
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Well also being young and probably somewhat active.
But it's a great habit to develop so you don't put on a pound every year like the western world tends to do.
One thing that helped me tremendously since I'm a cheapskate is the realization that:
" wait, you're telling me I will stay healthy AND save money by eating leftovers every other day!? Sold!"
It's actually quite scary the amount of money one can save when they buy and eat food to stay healthy instead of using it to feel good ( nothing wrong with that, I just don't overindulge in this habit)
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It's a depression-era holdover in the US.
I think it's also still somewhat related to what you eat. Over the years fast food has gotten a little less bad for you, with things like trans fat and sodium being targeted. But yeah everyone's grandma telling them to finish their plate all the time, or face punishment, definitely doesn't help. We teach our children to gorge themselves.
So many people don't want to accept it really is calories in vs calories out. Yes, even if you have PCOS, or whatever the fuck else. If you are somehow a genetic anomaly that does not meet this rule, please donate yourself to science after you die.
Get the Lose it app, scan in what you eat and go for a damn walk. You'll drop.
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I lost 120lbs and have managed to keep it off for almost three years now. I came to the same realization as OP. Problem is I don't have that thing, I can eat so goddamn much before I feel full that calorie counting will probably be a lifelong thing for me. Wish there was a pill or something to help because it's a case of constant self-control.
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And that was me thinking you should just continue stuffing your fat face even though you're no longer enjoying the experience.
I'm now starting to think that it's possible that OP's problem is actually more of a neurological one.
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I've read its also a cultural thing. As in, in China it's considered rude to finish your meal, as that means your host didn't provide enough food. Hence you always leave something left over. Contrary to that, in western cultures, it's considered rude to leave something of your meal, as that means you don't like the food.
I'm Chinese and all my family and branches of relatives all tell us to finish our food and not leave any for waste, we always bag leftovers too.
When I lived in China, my gf always insisted I don't waste any food that we cooked. We're both pretty thin so that could be a struggle at times. But part of the reason for this attitude is because she was raised in a village area without proper refrigeration available so not finishing most cooked foods meant risking illness from food spoiling later.
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Artificial sweeteners and highly processed foods can shut off your "I'm full" safety valve.
Read the labels on the foods you eat, educate yourself.
Corporations want you to eat to excess, it's profitable.
Which artificial sweeteners do that? Sounds interesting
I have never heard this before and I'm pretty sure it's nonsense.
I'm pretty sure it's nonsense
Maybe, maybe not. More research is needed.
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC7817779/
Nevertheless, human studies investigating the effect of artificial sweeteners on hunger-satiety cycle, via SCFA, are currently lacking.
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IMO it would have a lot to do with parents teaching their children to "finish their meal" even if they're full, you know, as if there's no such thing as refrigeration.
I'm a 100 pound they who's always - always - had trouble eating past the full feeling.
Like to me. Eating 'one more bite' past being full is worse then going to the gym and putting 20 extra pounds on.
Exceptions happen for holidays where we graze all day on many different foods. Variety being the spice of life n all.
But if it's a 3 course meal. I'll eat until I'm full. Pack it away. And eat later.
All you can eat places are completely wasted on me.
Sometimes with North America potions I get meals out of a 20/40$ take out.
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