Centipedes Don't Fuck : science

[–] [email protected] 109 points 3 months ago (6 children)

Ok now I'm curious about what the fuck the two centipedes I found in my basement that I thought were fucking were actually doing. They sure looked like they were fucking.

[–] rustyfish 176 points 3 months ago (1 children)

They were wrestling. Go back to bed.

[–] [email protected] 39 points 3 months ago (1 children)

wrestling 😏

[–] Speculater 20 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (1 children)

"Step-centipede, what are you doing?!"

[–] blanketswithsmallpox 10 points 3 months ago

I don't know how to boil the water ~~~

[–] [email protected] 108 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Maybe they were those queer centipedes that fuck in person. Degenerates

[–] [email protected] 37 points 3 months ago

They do it just for fun! Gross.

[–] [email protected] 51 points 3 months ago (6 children)

Don't humanize centipedes! That leads to strange and disturbing things...

[–] [email protected] 39 points 3 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (7 children)

too late

Too late

Too Late

TOO LATE
centipede morphmoe

There are way, way more "centipede monster girl" image results... DuckDuckGo/Google

Caterpillar girls are fine though.

[–] samus12345 25 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Eww, making it a head tail is so much worse!

[–] [email protected] 16 points 3 months ago

Just makes me wonder if it's a centipede girl or a centipede that ate a girl's brain and puppets her body around.

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[–] PunchingWood 35 points 3 months ago

[–] NABDad 29 points 3 months ago

Someone has already centipedized humans. This is the next step.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago

Don’t humanize centipedes

I'M DOING MY PART!

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago)

Just gonna take a quick stroll over to rule34.xxx and see what there is to see...

Edit: Jesus fuck 638 results. We just needed ONE to confirm the rule, but 638?!

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[–] [email protected] 26 points 3 months ago

When two centipedes ~~love each other~~ are both really hungry...

[–] numberfour002 22 points 3 months ago (2 children)

A disappointingly large proportion of the general population appears to be unable to tell the difference between centipedes and millipedes. Is it possible that the "centipedes" you saw were actually millipedes? If so, they may have been "fucking", or at least the millipede equivalent of it.

Additionally, it appears that this "fact" is actually wrong (big surprise, huh?). Many species of centipede do have courtship strategies that involve males and females meeting up. The sexes may even employ various forms of physical touch as part of the process. So, it's certainly possible that the critters you saw where centipedes courting each other.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago

Centipedes see other Centipedes as food, which is why they reproduce this way.

Source: made it up, but it seems logical. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[–] brap 94 points 3 months ago (2 children)

The last time I left sperm packets on the ground I was branded a "pervert" and a "freak" and told to leave the restaurant immediately before they called the police.

[–] Anticorp 49 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Have you tried growing 98 more legs first?

[–] [email protected] 18 points 3 months ago

Or at least 28 more

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[–] [email protected] 12 points 3 months ago

You need to dress it up as geocaching.

[–] fireweed 79 points 3 months ago* (last edited 3 months ago) (3 children)

Sooo are centipedes like fruit flies and not engage in any real form of sexual selection, or is the female going around judging the fuck out of every jizz pile she encounters?

"Mmm-mm, look at that poor viscosity, obviously from a low-quality male. This one on the other hand: deep color, firm texture, nice and sticky... clearly produced by a male with the superior genes I want to pass along to my offspring."

[–] [email protected] 22 points 3 months ago (3 children)

I'm upset no ones chimed in with a really technical breakdown and linked some studies

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[–] [email protected] 71 points 3 months ago (1 children)

The DoorDash approach to sexual reproduction. Fantastic.

[–] [email protected] 24 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Oh boy, the jar arrived!

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[–] jenny_ball 66 points 3 months ago (2 children)

have you seen a centipede? completely unfuckable

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 months ago (1 children)

...unless you are a leg man...

[–] occhionaut 9 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Now im imagining a centipede sticking out fifty pantyhosed legs from around the corner while catcalling its mark.

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[–] [email protected] 13 points 3 months ago

Woah there buddy, please don't fetish shame.

[–] [email protected] 38 points 3 months ago (2 children)

So THAT'S how Vance & his wife have kids: he leaves her some fresh sperm in the couch

[–] [email protected] 11 points 3 months ago

damn, the lore thickens

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[+] [email protected] 37 points 3 months ago* (last edited 2 months ago) (1 children)

[deleted]

[–] roguetrick 39 points 3 months ago (3 children)

Most cephalopods die after mating. Their sex hormones make them go crazy and they stop looking for food except to eat themselves occasionally. Once the sex hormone glad starts pumping them out, it doesn't stop until they die a horrible death. Live fast and die young.

[–] [email protected] 20 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I was very excited about humanity killing itself off and letting the superior line of sapience take over until I learned this fact. It's going to be a bit before the octopi are ready to create a civilization.

[–] [email protected] 10 points 3 months ago (3 children)

They don't do any parenting, either. Nor do siblings ever team up. Baby octopus just has to take care of itself, alone.

It's weird, they're so intelligent, but don't teach anything to the next generation.

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago

I've met people like this

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[–] [email protected] 35 points 3 months ago

Taking “hit it and quit it” to the next level.

Skeet and yeet.

[–] [email protected] 32 points 3 months ago (7 children)

Does this mean jd vance is a centipede?

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[–] [email protected] 17 points 3 months ago (1 children)

Huh, guess I'm a centipede then.

[–] [email protected] 21 points 3 months ago (2 children)

what do you mean by this WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THIS

[–] ZoopZeZoop 11 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I'm assuming he's male, but no females are collecting his packets.

[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

your honor it's not baby trapping he left those condoms out on purpose

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[–] Nuke_the_whales 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

So we're just walking around and stepping on centipede cum?

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[–] Orbituary 10 points 3 months ago (1 children)

I've heard that this is how incels reproduce.

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[–] [email protected] 9 points 3 months ago

Relationship goals.

[–] TastyWheat 9 points 3 months ago

I'm pretty sure this is how the junkies in my town reproduce.

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