this post was submitted on 14 Jan 2024
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[–] [email protected] 6 points 10 months ago (5 children)

What bothers me is when people use that argument to advocate for replacing 'constructs' which evolved more or less naturally over tens of thousands of years, even before the dawn of civilization, with something deliberately engineered by individual humans. Is a cis-normative nuclear family the only way that it's possible to live? Of course not, but it's also what the vast majority of the population wants in their lives, which is why it's the standard.

[–] [email protected] 29 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

This is patently absurd. For one thing, the nuclear family itself is not currently what the vast majority of the population wants; if you look at the global population, both now and historically, the extended family is dominant. I might as well argue that children abandoning their parents and home is an unnatural construct, that's replacing the 'tribal' way of living that was natural for humans for millennia. I could further argue that (since the nuclear family only became the most common type in the US in the 1960s and 70s), it was done in corporate interests to sell more cars and suburban houses, and that it is in fact YOU that is slobbering all over corporate cock.

But I wouldn't make that argument, because it's reductive and, frankly, a bit silly to let a narrative take the place of actually reading some sociological studies.

[–] daltotron 1 points 10 months ago (1 children)

But I wouldn’t make that argument, because it’s reductive and, frankly, a bit silly to let a narrative take the place of actually reading some sociological studies.

I think if "you wouldn't" make that argument, because it's reductive, then you should refute it, after you have spelled out the narrative in your comment. I would appreciate that. Or just point me in the right direction idk that might be good enough.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago)

My personal view is that you should always be wary of people asserting "this is how it is". We're in a science sub; we know that the purpose of a hypothesis is to rigorously attempt to disprove it and find counterexamples.

To discuss an area that I know some specifics about and can be more confident on: the historiography of the French revolution. Starting with George's Lefebvre, the Marxist historians had a clear idea of what the revolution represented: a movement from the feudal mode of production to the capitalist, and so while their work is incredibly important and academically worth studying, they also tend to go into their work with a clear idea of what they wanted to find. So when the revisionists (starting with Cobban) come along, they find a lot of inconsistencies; the facts of the period don't directly align with what the Marxist narratives wanted it to be (e.g. Cobban's disagreement is that he thinks the feudal mode was near extinct by the time of the Revolution, and that it was more a political conflict than social).

Bringing it back to your question: I disagree with the narrative I put because I think reductive narratives aren't helpful, and cause us to miss a lot of nuance. The nuclear family was dominant in England from the 13th Century onwards, but to leave it there misses a host of interesting social structures and changes (e.g. the role of the church and monasteries as social institutions that exist wholly separate from the family). Moreover, I don't think it's helpful to use the past as a suggestion for how we should build our future. The 'return to tradition' that's suggested often has an idealised view of the past that misses all this nuance. The narrative around 'ancient greek masculinity', for instance, conveniently misses off their ideas around pederasty, which we perceive as abhorrent today.

As for reading, Foucault on how we like to categorise everything is quite interesting. If reading isn't your cup of tea, the Thinking Allowed podcast from the BBC has an episode on Foucault that covers him that's worth listening to.

[–] [email protected] 16 points 10 months ago* (last edited 10 months ago) (1 children)

That’s a huge strawman jk. We really just want the hets to stop trying to harm/kill people that are different from them.

TEH GAYS WANT TO DESTROY THE FAMILY is vintage homophobia and really needs to go jk.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago

How convenient of you to ignore not only a much bigger chunk of human history than the last couple thousand years (if even that), and so so many cultures that aren't the handful you're familiar with, but also all of the vast systemic social man made influences that make it that way, like religion, patriarchy, and even capitalism...

[–] [email protected] 4 points 10 months ago (1 children)

That's what people do because they were told so.

God has an elephant head and loves pancakes?

Thunder comes from Thor hitting, ... Clouds with his hammer?

You go to geaven/hell if you do this don't...

...

It's just what many peoples software run on, because that was how they were taught/indoctrinated from birth and they didn't really have the need to break out of it. And well, if it works it might do it for them, the problem is they might think your life/lifestyle is the wrong way to live.

[–] [email protected] 5 points 10 months ago (1 children)

That’s what people do because they were told so.

Nah, man, I happen to think that women are amazing and the idea of living with a woman who loves me is pretty damn cool.

[–] [email protected] 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I'm not talking about love, but the artificial idea that when you found someone, then you must stay with them "forever" and other things christian marriage enforcing.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago (1 children)

I'm not certain that I possess the linguistic ability to adequately express the full magnitude of my feelings on this matter. Sharing my entire life with this wonderful, magical, creature who loves me back, is exactly what pushes my buttons. Nobody has to enforce that upon me.

[–] [email protected] 2 points 10 months ago

Sure, and that applies to LGBT+ too, and also if the fire vanes.

[–] Anticorp 3 points 10 months ago (1 children)

What bothers me even more is that for a lot of these subjects they're keen to tear it down, but don't have anything to replace it. People are creatures of order, and patterns. We can't operate effectively as a society without structure, and mutual understanding.

[–] [email protected] 8 points 10 months ago (1 children)

Who is “they” anticorp? Tell me, who wants to destroy the nuclear family?

[–] Custoslibera 3 points 10 months ago

Immigrants and trans people! Obviously.

/s