this post was submitted on 17 Nov 2023
27 points (93.5% liked)

Autism

6899 readers
501 users here now

A community for respectful discussion and memes related to autism acceptance. All neurotypes are welcome.

We have created our own instance! Visit Autism Place the following community for more info.

Community:

Values

  • Acceptance
  • Openness
  • Understanding
  • Equality
  • Reciprocity
  • Mutuality
  • Love

Rules

  1. No abusive, derogatory, or offensive post/comments e.g: racism, sexism, religious hatred, homophobia, gatekeeping, trolling.
  2. Posts must be related to autism, off-topic discussions happen in the matrix chat.
  3. Your posts must include a text body. It doesn't have to be long, it just needs to be descriptive.
  4. Do not request donations.
  5. Be respectful in discussions.
  6. Do not post misinformation.
  7. Mark NSFW content accordingly.
  8. Do not promote Autism Speaks.
  9. General Lemmy World rules.

Encouraged

  1. Open acceptance of all autism levels as a respectable neurotype.
  2. Funny memes.
  3. Respectful venting.
  4. Describe posts of pictures/memes using text in the body for our visually impaired users.
  5. Welcoming and accepting attitudes.
  6. Questions regarding autism.
  7. Questions on confusing situations.
  8. Seeking and sharing support.
  9. Engagement in our community's values.
  10. Expressing a difference of opinion without directly insulting another user.
  11. Please report questionable posts and let the mods deal with it. Chat Room
  • We have a chat room! Want to engage in dialogue? Come join us at the community's Matrix Chat.

.

Helpful Resources

founded 2 years ago
MODERATORS
BackOnMyBS
27
Looking for advice/sympathy about anxiety (pawb.social)
submitted 1 year ago by [email protected] to c/autism
9 comments fedilink hide all child comments
 

Hey autistic peeps. I'm not really in a great space mentally right now, and figured I'd ask if anyone knows of any good coping mechanisms or tricks or whatever.

Anyway, some background. I'm one of those perpetually online types with no real irl hobbies. As you probably are aware (because Lemmy), there's been a lot of disruption in the online space recently. There's also been a fair amount of disruption in my personal life which I shan't go into. Kinda tempted to make a post here or /c/mentalhealth detailing my woefull history, but I'm not sure if there's interest.

Anyway, the main thing is that since May, I've been struggling with anxiety, and been kind of letting it rot, get worse and pull in other things. It's at the point now where it feels a bit overwhelming and it's actively getting in the way of my thought patterns, which is as scary as it sounds.

Through talking to people (including friends who I really appreciate taking the time to put up with me) about it, I've been able to drill it down to two main "fears":

  • I'm scared of trying new things or enjoying familiar things in case they get taken away from me in the future.
  • I'm vey uncomfortable with the idea of being restricted from things because of who I am or what I believe in.

They struck me as being, for want of a better term, "autismy" thoughts, and get the feeling my nt friends dont "get" it. Just wondering if either of these statements resonate with anyone, or if anyone has advice on combatting them.

you are viewing a single comment's thread
view the rest of the comments
[–] BackOnMyBS 1 points 11 months ago

Sorry it took me a bit to reply myself.

No need to apologize! I take a while to engage in topics that require heavy mental processing, especially if they are emotionally loaded as well. Take all the time you need. Also, we're helping you anyway. Your pace isn't affecting me at all.

I think honestly it’s the fear of change. I like to fall back and rely on familiar things as a comfort mechanic. If those things aren’t there, I feel anxiety and stress. It’s 2023 and every social media website has either been destroyed or looks to me like it’s going downhill.

Same! There's something comforting at a fundamental level about it. It's like if someone asks why loud noises are uncomfortable. It's because loud noises are uncomfortable. It doesn't go beyond that. Routine and familiar things are comfortable. There's nothing beyond that. I could try to make rational sense of it, but that would just be me trying to develop a theory. For me, it just is.

I’m so afraid of the “hurt” that comes from losing access to things that my brain puts up a big warning sign saying “don’t enjoy this because it’ll hurt when it goes away”.

That sounds terrible! It's like your a prisoner of depression where the punishment is that you cannot enjoy anything, even if you have access to it.

As an analogy, it feels almost like a person who falls hopelessly in love with someone, then goes through a rough breakup and feels that they don’t want to fall in love because they don’t to go through that pain again. Only instead of love it’s like, interests and stuff.

That makes sense. Going off of that analogy, what do the people that go through this rough break-ups and subsequent avoidance of love do to overcome it?

Thanks for the invite, but I don’t think I’m in the best state to try to push myself socially now.

You're welcome! And I'm happy you're not pushing yourself beyond your limits. We'll probably be there if you ever recognize that you are in a position to socialize more 🙂