He isn’t my biological dad. He actually had to take his dna kit to someone else and have that man spit in the tube, after he registered the dna to his email account. He admitted this to everyone in our family, at our kitchen table, upon receiving the kit as a gift. Since he divorced my mother (the woman who raised me), he has been forcing me to live with him and care for him. He had a restraining order placed against me in 2018, told the judge he served me with documents. He actually asked me to come over to visit, after claiming he had served me with a restraining order. I was never served with documents. He then framed me for violating the restraining order because I, at some point, was invited over to my parents’ house, where he claims I broke the order. I notified the judge that I was never served the documents and the case was dismissed without charges.
In 2019, I fell behind on payments to my trailer, after losing my second house in a short sale. He called the repo place and told them where I lived so that it could be repossessed faster. I spent about a year being homeless. He bought an rv and parked it in the rental space that I had been renting before the repo. He did this just so that I would be forced to give up my address. This meant that if I bought another trailer to park there, the space would already be occupied and I would have to change my address to another space in the park. He basically stole my rental space out from under me. He then told me that I legally had to live with him, which was a lie. I was forced to live in that rental space with him, while he kept my childhood home empty, out of spite. During this time, I continued working, and continued trying to join the army. I had left my career and had signed my children over to my mother in anticipation of attending boot camp for the army national guard. I was denied admission after they realized I had a metal clip on one of my arteries from a past surgery. I had left my job for the opportunity of joining the military.
“Dad” spent the next year belittling me and verbally abusing me. He forced me to live with him in my childhood home, after he sold his used trailer that was occupying my previous rental space. I walked through the house and realized there were blood stains all over my mother’s bedroom floor. He became upset and refused to discuss it. I notified the police and the sheriff’s department about the stains, since it occurred just before my parents’ divorce, and because he was defensive about it. If that sounds like I was overreacting, consider the fact that he beat one of my relatives to death around 1990, and she is buried along the North West side of the house! Anyway, upon resettling into my childhood home, I was allowed to sleep on the floor of my old bedroom. I was not allowed to place a door lock on my bedroom. There were times when I would wake up and find “dad” in my room, kicking me as I slept and cussing at me. I woke to find red marks and the start of bruises in the inside of my thighs that became darker bruises as the day continued; leading me to believe that I had been abused in my sleep the previous night.
Why didn’t I just live with my husband? So where is my husband in all this? Well, he left me in 2017, after we had bought our second home. He gave his wallet and car to a group of guys that have been terrorizing me since then. They all take turns with his wallet and even his email account now. They love sending out emailed selfies of each of them, dressed as my husband, while verbally abusing me in messages. My husband has walked out in the past. He used to walk out on me and our children all the time. He would leave for his friends’ bachelor pad where he would stay for days. He would drink, play video games, and sleep there. He would take his clothes and other items with him, and announce he wasn’t returning. He even threatened to have me killed and replaced by a mail order bride from some place like Poland. That was around 2016. I shouldn’t have agreed to reconcile with him. I have filed for divorce twice from him (2013 and around 2015). We reconciled twice because he would refuse to attend court dates and drag the process out until the judge dismissed it for my husband’s lack of attendance. Why so many divorces? Well, he hit me in 2013, bashed holes into the walls of our home, and shoved my infant son’s crib across the room with my son in it. In 2015, he choked me while I was holding my newborn daughter. I have already had one restraining order against him. Since our separation in 2016, he has sent gangs after me. Some have just made verbal threats. Others have broken into my residence, damaged food in my fridge, and one even stabbed me after following me off of a freeway.
Oh, and to make matters worse, I need dna testing on my children. My husband, in a fit of rage, revealed that he was letting his friends rape me in my sleep when we were married. He would insist on fixing dinner and yeah, it made me sleepy after eating his dinners. I was the only one working, so I thought he was trying to be nice. It turns out they would give him items like vape supplies and other free things in exchange. So, my husband didn’t father my children (which is why he hasn’t cared to even visit them since 2016). My daughter really needs dna taken because she was born blue and looked like she was dying just after birth. She was rushed from the room, but returned looking normal. She measured shorter than when she had left the room. The hospital never made any comment about whether she might have been swapped in ICU by accident.
So here I am, 35 years old, with a graduate degree in a STEM field, an ASVAB score of 97th percentile, and past yearly earnings that were around $70,000. I have to spend my days watching my elderly “father” frame me, degrade me, and bully me. I think I’m going to stop cleaning the house, cooking, doing laundry, and doing dishes as contribution, while living here. I’m also going to stop buying groceries for him. He won’t even tell me who my biological dad is, but he constantly makes it sound like he blackmailed my biological dad for money when I was a child. He constantly makes remarks about my blood type being different than his, as if he thinks he is better for being O+, instead of O- like me. He bullies me and tells me to cover my head because I shave my head; revealing a different head shape than he has. He hates it when I point out that he has black hair instead of a light brown, like mine. I like to tell him that my real dad must have had brown hair like mine. Oh, and if I really want to see him rage out, all I have to do is show him a math problem that I have completed, or something artistic that I have created with functions on Desmos or Geogebra. He hates mathematics. He has tried to destroy my career because he hates the fact that I enjoy my job, which is heavily based on mathematics. He throws fits every time I discuss anything math related. He behaved the same way when my “mother” would discuss her career. She had majored in math, as well, but her graduate degree was in education, not math. He would often bully her in an attempt to make her quit her job, insisting that teaching wasn’t a real job, like his.
I don’t know what happened in the late 80’s, but I wish my biological father had raised me instead of allowing this arrangement to plague my life. I am literally waiting for my elderly “father” to die. I think his job (and now retirement) was only possible because of some leverage he had against my biological dad by having me in his custody.
